Introduction
The shift between the world of the mind and the world of truth is like moving from a scribble to a drawing, or a photograph. There is so much noise in the world of the mind, so much “must” and “need” and “this is how it is” and “this is how it is not”.
It is a lack of trust that life, that love, can be so simple, so quiet. Like it truly is.
The difficulty comes in shifting between these dimensions. It’s like jumping from a cliff into an unknown abyss, something that looks bottomless and without boundaries. And it’s challenging.
We have grown used to believing that there is no way that things can be fine exactly as they are. And so our minds continue jumping and explaining, complicating matters at every turn.
We experience the world through the wisdom and knowledge that live within us and by the manner in which we perceive ourselves, the world and the relationship between them. This allows us the ability to move through life, bringing that wisdom and knowledge alive and changing them from possibility to reality. The knowledge is guided by the understandings, constructs and rules that we have adopted or inherited, or perhaps discovered, created or invented. They act similarly to fiber optics. They are the generators that allow knowledge and wisdom to be transmitted.
Observing
There is THE TRUTH, the true manner of the world, things as they are. And there is REALITY, the world which we have created with our magnetizing force.
Our thoughts are the tool we use to magnetize. Thoughts attract and magnetize particles from infinite space and a mirror image is created. Energy attracts a similar energy from the universe. Like attracts like. Opposite attracts opposite. Full attracts full. Silence attracts silence.
The truth is there. It is eternal. It doesn’t need to strain, push, pull, manipulate or create friction in order to be created. It can’t be created because it has already been created. It is alive. It constantly nourishes us.
What is being created is reality and we are the ones who are creating it, through our thoughts. This is what makes it so fragile.
Reality is often created without us even realizing it, through our belief in it and identification with it.
In other words, it exists only as long as we believe the thoughts. The moment we believe them a little less, or not at all, this invented reality weakens and disappears. What once existed no longer does.
When our minds no longer create reality, our lives stop being the fruits of our thoughts, but rather of a completely different wisdom. Then, we can live the true motion of life, the way that basic order takes place.
As long as we believe our thoughts, they sustain our reality – and we, who have lived this reality for some time and identify with it more and more, find ourselves further and further from the truth, swept into an illusion that is merely the reality that we ourselves have created through our thoughts.
When we identify with our thoughts, they completely shape the reality in which we live. They even have the power to kill. The power is not the thought itself, which is only condensed energy, but rather our beliefs and intentions; our “content”. When we focus our attention on something, it increases and expands.
This reality that we have invented, this illusion, doesn’t exist if I don’t believe in it. It is therefore extremely fragile – the moment we no longer believe it, it no longer is. It awakens fears because we know that we are living a “story” that, if not reinforced, will collapse – and this is a huge and energy-consuming responsibility.
It creates forcefulness and violence because the fear that this imaginary reality might disintegrate makes us want to protect it with great fervor; because we think that, otherwise, everything will be lost, that there will be chaos, and that we will die.
When we say that the fear is illusory, this does not mean that there is nothing to fear, nor does it mean that pain and fear and threats will not occur. They do occur and they can be difficult and painful. What we need to see and remember is that we are creating these difficult situations through our beliefs and thoughts. We might even reinforce the difficult reality and make it more difficult, even when we are against it and working to change it. Sometimes we are aware that this is happening, but usually not.
This is why a person who is suffering or in pain can see that the wave of violence and suffering that has befallen him is in fact a creation of his own thoughts. That he can choose to not create this reality, even if he has been the victim of severe violence, alienation or exploitation.
This is how a person who is feeling hurt or grief can see that she is not helpless. That even through this pain, she can draw from her natural wisdom and create a new reality for both herself and others.
When we are able to look at the thoughts that create pain and know that we are not our thoughts, the pain diminishes and sometimes even disappears. This is how we know that even when the most difficult things occur, our true nature will not be affected, and we can turn to it at any given moment, hear the wisdom it speaks, and in the next moment live it. This is how transformation is created. This is how to move between dimensions.
The truth is eternal. No matter what, we will return to it. It is what we will encounter after we return from our journeys through illusion, through our cycles of samsara, when we are disappointed and exhausted. We can doubt truth and nothing can stop us from doing that. But nothing happens to truth when we doubt it. Through our doubt, our inner voice and our deep knowing, we can reach only one destination: Truth.
Understanding, Seeing, Knowing: Breaking Down the Confusion
We have gotten so used to letting the mind control us that we have forgotten how to live our lives and experience the world in a way that is not through the mind.
What can help me awaken from illusion is learning to distinguish between understanding, seeing and knowing.
Understanding is using the mind to conceptualize things according to logic and pre-existing thoughts. We can only “understand” when reality appears to match (or can be adapted to match) the thought and its construct, that to which we have grown accustomed. This is why “understanding” is often limited and constricting.
Because it can only see things according to what the limited mind can perceive.
Because it ignores the rest. And the rest is what’s important. The mind sees only biased particles, according to the thoughts and beliefs that serve as its filter.
Seeing is a direct encounter with truth, without any medium. Simple. Present.
When we encounter truth we know that the nature of a person is light. An infinite energy. Dependent on nothing. The natural state of being. Nothing that was caused or invented.
I am light and I see light in the other person. I am life and I see life in the other person. I am motion and I see motion in the other person, in the world. We can see clearly and precisely when we become simple, like children; when we no longer identify with thoughts but rather with the state of being itself – with the “me” that is not my thoughts.
This is the umbilicus of the world, the core of creation. It is the center of the bicycle wheel, where all of the spokes, each one different from the other, meet at their source, at the place that allows them to move and to create movement for others.
Here, in this place where a person meets his true nature, he can then see it in the other person and the world at large. He can be one with everything.
This is his center, the center of all things. A person cannot feel lonely in this place because he is part of everything. He belongs to it all.
There is no other possibility.
Knowing is seeing from a place of love and compassion. Knowing, like “to know a woman”, is the motion in which I end and there is no longer two. There I know the other person because I am not me and he is not he. We both awaken from the illusion that there are two or more people and return to dwell within the one. Because that is our true nature. In fact, that is truth. There is no more drifting or identifying with different and separate identities.
Everything is motion. An occurrence. A state of being in itself.
Through this observation, in moments of full concentration and focusing, there is quiet. Stillness.
This is not because there is a lack of noise, or a lack of expectations.
This natural motion is rooted in silence, stillness, awareness and lack of movement – but not because something is stuck. Rather, it is me witnessing the affirmation of truth.
I am simultaneously the motion and the change. The stillness and the silence.
I am one with the motion and in this I also know the motion.
And I am then revealed to myself, that in which the motion exists, and I am silent.
On a daily basis, throughout our lives, we make a lot of noise and act from a place of obstinacy. Opinions, desires, fears, needs – they all happen simultaneously, pressuring and pushing. We call this life.
In actuality, none of this allows us to see what has been there all along. The ability to be within the emptiness of myself. An emptiness that makes space. An emptiness that allows that stillness which is found and present in every moment of our lives to come alive, fully and completely present. This is a place that we will want to see, to know, be in – and see what happens from there.
This observation is like an agreement to be silent. To be the still waters within which the fullness can be revealed.
This has three implications:
1. Being in silence is me agreeing to be present and comfortable within the silence. When the silence envelops me, I allow myself to experience the thoughts of fear and emptiness that I believe are in me and within me.
2. It is experiencing that I don’t know who I am, and that everything I thought I knew was just a collection of thoughts. It is giving in to that knowledge.
3. It is knowing that my desires or cravings are not for specific people or things, but are rather making space for that which is pure and precise within me to be revealed.
In these moments it becomes possible to look at thoughts with sharp accuracy. Everything will be clear, pure and obvious. The rest just fades away.
Observing is actually not a journey.
A journey is something that you do externally.
A journey is something you do for what is “not yet”.
This “not yet” is thoughts, goals, dreams and desires.
It is easy to identify them. They are immediately accompanied by frustration, fear and misery. It is a state of dissatisfaction. It is a lacking that is a black hole. A true and infinite bottomless pit of nothing. Eternal pain. Relief that is only momentary.
If you try to stop it, you will again find yourself expending great effort, creating friction and resistance. You will once again feel pain, anger, frustration and despair.
Only when you see it, you stop. Not because you try to stop, not because you make a decision to stop, not because you are taking measurements or calculations – but because you realize the futility of the journey and you relax. You know that there is no reason for external movement, no reason to expend great effort, no reason to push or pull. Calm and relaxed, you stop and rest. At home. Inside.
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Actively Experiencing – An Introduction
We did not create the experience of flesh and matter. This is how we were created. A deep and mysterious wisdom invited us to experience it and we said yes.
Therefore, the human journey is not meant to justify our time spent here or to judge it, nor is it to identify with it. The human journey is to actively experience. To say yes to my existence, yes to flesh, yes to matter – but not to believe in them. Instead, to actively experience them; to see what happens to us when we believe that we are substance, that we are our needs or fears, that we are things.
When we experience matter, we also encounter our identification with it and thus the empty place, the lacking and the fear that have been created from a dependence on matter. And through this we also learn and experience what is not matter – in other words, spirit.
This dependence is seen when I value myself according to the amount of money I have or when I believe the thought that I am my body and that I end when my body ends. It is, of course, expressed in my fear of death.
The truth is that I am light, a flowing energy. It is as simple as that. By virtue of my being alive. Just like all other living things are life energy, so too am I. This life energy is perfect. It is life, exactly as it is. It cannot be added to or detracted from.
The “me” that is light is what I truly am. It is the true essence of my spirit. This life energy is not the “me” that I have come to know through the list of qualities, capabilities, successes and failures that I have used to define myself, but is rather my true essence. It is the source of my intuition, an inner calling that cannot be argued, the spark in my eyes – the “me” that is truly me.
I know this “me” with a deep inner knowing. It is not a knowing of the mind nor is it an understanding; it is rather a remembrance – an intimate familiarity with my essence, with my true nature.
All the rest is an illusion. And we have to go through it to awaken from it and return to dwell in the state of being itself.
This is actively experiencing – the full realm of senses, emotions and thoughts experienced by our body. It comprises a complete passage: Entering into it, dwelling within it, and leaving it.
The power of actively experiencing is the extent to which it awakens in us emotions and thoughts that were dormant until now – that we did not know existed, or saw and wished to ignore.
When we actively experience, there is clear and beautiful proof that we have said yes to the soul that we are; that we have chosen to respond to mystery, that we don’t feel a necessity to cling to the familiar self.
Actively experiencing is not an external circumstance. It is a state of being.
It is what we see and feel at any given moment.
The more that we say yes to the present moment and what it awakens in us, our experiencing will be fuller, clearer and shorter. It will allow us to grow more.
When we actively experience completely, when we say yes fully, we need only one moment to experience the deep knowing that distinguishes between who we thought we were – thoughts, beliefs and feelings to which we have become conditioned – and the experience of who we truly are: Beings of light, immense life-giving energies that create through thoughts and attention-focusing.
A significant portion of most people’s lives is spent resisting this active experience.
Most of us view the question of survival, continuity, family, work, relationships and the like as our life’s mission.
We are often not aware that “continuity” doesn’t necessarily entail happiness, creativity or freedom of being – although our fear of loss and change is greater than our sacrifice of these things.
This is why we have adopted beliefs that say:
“First let’s solve today’s problems and then we will say yes to actively experiencing that which might open doors to something new.”
“First let’s prevent damage and ensure continuity and then we’ll deal with the quality of life and personal fulfillment.”
“You can’t live if you don’t first deal with what’s urgent, with prevention, with security.”
This is similar to a person who walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads: “Free beer tomorrow.”
So many of us walk through life holding onto dead skin, to empty wrappings, limiting ourselves to live through the old – hoping for good, focused on coping and managing crises that create more crises and more necessity for coping, promising ourselves that “later I will truly live.”
And then we die.
Therefore, any resistance to actively experiencing – just like any choice in something that is old, dead, past its time, or based on principle – is limited. Actively experiencing is when a person makes love to himself. It is a knowing that is infinite; abundance itself, more beautiful than any creation or anything more than we could even imagine. A person’s willingness to die for himself is a condition for his rebirth, for birthing himself anew.
In my opinion, the most beautiful understanding of synergy is “the dance between the human journey and the grace of God.”
Actively Experiencing – Life Itself
We are alive. In other words, we are in life – we are in something that is taking place. “In” means being in a specific state – but being in a specific state does not necessarily mean that I am experiencing it.
It is an open invitation that is nothing but an empty and meaningless package unless I respond to it. The situation itself is completely void of power.
What turns life and the situations we go through into an active experience, into an occurrence, is our saying yes. It is our honest desire to see beyond thoughts; to touch the very nature of things. It is submitting to what is happening and to the inner desire that is awakening within ourselves. Feeling strong, being stirred, allowing movement to flow anew through and between the thoughts that have been organized so well within these structures that are being maintained and reinforced by the logic in which we believe.
The active experience that we go through gives life a new form. The duality of “good” and “evil” or “worthy” and “unworthy” is no more than a limited and restrictive frame of reference.
You experience in order to learn about “boundaries”, by touching them and seeing how they feel. And then, when you are curious and alert, you recognize in each moment how you feel about everything. It is a release that allows you to grow beyond “good” and “evil” or “allowed” and “forbidden”.
Manners of Actively Experiencing
Actively experiencing occurs in three primary ways:
- Observing the thought as it occurs.
- Becoming acquainted with the observer.
- Remembering our true nature.
Observing the thought as it occurs:
Actively experiencing is when we allow ourselves to truly be in situations which awaken dormant thoughts.
It is like opening a bag of thoughts and feelings and allowing them to be released.
These feelings, in turn, point to thoughts that are currently triggering us.
When we observe a thought and look directly at it – like a camera simply documenting, without any opinion or judgment, just looking at things as they are – air enters and fills the space between us and the thought.
This is how we fully know that we are not the thought. That we do not identify with it.
This is how we also know that through the power of our thoughts we create reality. They are not creating something that has not already been created, but they are magnetizing from the infinite existing possibilities and building constructs of reality, within the construct of the self.
Through the power of thoughts we build and destroy worlds, and observation is what allows us to witness this.
Becoming acquainted with the observer:
At this point, actively experiencing allows us to feel what it means to be the force which created the thought and sustained it through our beliefs. We are now witness to our complete selves, to “it”, to the quiet fullness in its entirety. There is nothing to do. There is nothing to prevent. There is no judgment.
Remembering our true nature:
When we live an illusion that creates reality, we live in emptiness, we see through emptiness and we conduct our lives in fear of total emptiness – death.
When I say “illusion”, I do not mean that it does not exist. It exists and has a great impact. It is the reality of our lives when we believe in it. But – and this is a huge “but” – it cannot do anything to light. It cannot touch it, take anything from it or change it in any way. Since the illusion is invented, it will eventually end, when something happens to its inventor or when an awakening occurs. The light will forever be light – eternal and indestructible.
When we awaken to this knowledge and trust it with all our might, we no longer feel the danger that is buried within the thought.
Moreover, in order to trust this knowledge completely, we must go through the experience. We must come close to the thought, identify with it and learn about how it impacts us when we believe it. This is why actively experiencing is so important. This is why saying yes to everything is essential and cannot be done partially.
When we remember the purpose of our existence – that it is neither survival nor continuity; that it is not reaching higher rungs on a ladder that we have created or aligning ourselves with planes that we have invented in our imagination, but is rather awakening to our true nature and returning to live in a state of being itself – we will observe. We will be awake.
The shift that occurs when we actively experience is what allows us to feel the impact of thoughts, to see the illusory world in action, and to wake up from it. It allows us to be one who notices and observes – to be what we truly are.
This participation is expressed in fully saying yes to everything that happens in life – to not resisting what is happening or judging it, but rather moving through it aware of what is awakening inside of me, and then observing the thoughts that arrive, fully exposed and smiling at the observer, at my true nature. I am responsible for this and this is what will lead to a true state of existence, one that emerges from the source.
From my experience and understanding, this happens quietly. So quietly that the motion is barely noticeable. There are almost no thoughts at all, and if they do exist, it’s only because they are carrying the spirit, the word, the intention.
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Giving Oneself Over
I think that when you remove the drama, the act of giving oneself over feels like complete silence.
It is the absence of movement, thought, identity or paradoxes. It is full presence.
Giving oneself over is the absolute yes. It is seeing the good, and knowing that it is not the opposite of bad.
It’s more like what remains after a big jolt if, when we were in it, we didn’t close our eyes or stop breathing, but rather just remained there, inside the great noise.
And then, amidst the commotion, without us doing anything to move it forward or stop it, we become enveloped in silence.
There is something familiar in the silence. And even if we have never been in this silence before, it is home. It is recognizing the good, without resistance of any kind.
I think that truly giving oneself over has nothing to do with sacrifice. It is more like taking the only path that actually exists.
Giving oneself over is constant motion. It is responding to the moment from a place of completely releasing. It is the way I awaken completely in spirit, emotion, thought and body.
The same motion of shifting from the deep sleep of complete unawareness to the wakefulness that is in awareness; separating the temporal from the eternal, the illusory from the substantial, the nature of things as they are.
This is the only motion that I can truly call the motion of life. The rest is just a compromise.
From the perspective of the world of fear – which is driven by lacking, “not anymore” and “not yet” – giving oneself over is giving in. It is despair, or something extremely dangerous.
From the perspective of synergy, giving oneself over is a motion of life, a gate through which we leave the old behind and the new can show itself. To be completely accurate, it is not new – it is the same thing that was there the whole time, only now its time has come to be revealed before us.
From the perspective of the world of lacking, when we give ourselves over to another, we become controlled by him or her. The very act of giving ourselves over is conceived as giving over our energy to another; relinquishing ourselves to his or her command.
From the perspective of synergy, giving oneself over is the possibility of discovering one’s true power – a power that is not invented by him nor developed in any physical or mental gym, but rather is drawn from inner truth and ancient wisdom.
In the world of fear, giving oneself over is sacrifice. In the world of synergy, giving oneself over is saying yes to life and allowing the mysteries to be revealed.
In the world of lacking, giving oneself over creates more lacking. In the world of synergy, giving oneself over reveals our constant connection to wholeness, to bounty, to the infinite. It allows things to move by themselves and discover their own nature.
Giving oneself over cannot be identified by an action that was done. No action has a specific quality.
If I give charity with disgust or scorn, the money I have given will carry this energy and pass it forward. It will remain infused in this energy and will only return to a state of love when an awakened person sees it or receives it.
Alternatively, I could give money or clothes to charity and infuse it with love and beauty, knowing that I am one with the person who will receive it. I could be grateful for the opportunity to send forth that energy and bring about blessing.
How can you know that you have given yourself over?
Giving oneself over is conducting oneself with the knowledge that there is a great power in the motion that is happening, its direction and its intention, because they are a result of my consciousness. In other words, they are a result of the extent to which I know that I am love and light and the extent to which I believe the thoughts that tell me a different story, or even the opposite.
Therefore, when I encounter a situation or person according to what my interpreting and conceptualizing mind says, I can only go as far as the mind allows me to go, or believes that I can go. And I will stop when it tells me that it’s impossible to continue.
In order to move beyond and operate within the realm of the “impossible”, I need to agree to completely let go. I need to agree to take a leap of faith.
It’s not heroism. It’s not dramatic. It’s a simple and vital agreement to leave the floor behind – because this is the only way we will know that we can fly.
This is giving oneself over.
Why is it important for me to know whether it’s me giving myself over? Why is it important for me to know whether it is ego or the motion of life?
Because every move that I make in my life – every step I take, every action or choice that I make – is another opportunity to see, with more accuracy and more precision, whether I am operating from a place of love or fear; whether I am coming from a place of fullness or from a belief that I am lacking.
The ability to distinguish between the two allows me to distinguish between a life of delusion – created by the mind about its very tight and solid, but also sterile and misleading world – and the very alive simplicity of truth, the nature of things.
When I give myself over – I see the truth because I am no longer creating noise from my thoughts or distractions.
When I am stubborn – I cling to beliefs. I do not let others challenge me about my tightly-held conclusions. I sometimes see others as enemies or something dangerous. I suffer and I cause suffering. And I continue the cycle of illusions, tempting others to enter the same realm and be misled, as well.
Can someone else know whether or not I have given myself over?
This question offers two areas for observation.
On the one hand, since the motion of giving oneself over is internal (that of a person within himself) we can’t know for sure whether in this moment a person has let his feet leave the ground; whether he has left behind his habits and fears, needs and dreams; whether he has said yes to what is happening now and what he wants to happen – or, if he is busy calculating whether it’s worthwhile, acting out of fear and an attempt to prevent pain, and doing something to achieve whatever it is that he wants.
From a spiritual perspective, the very purpose of marriage is an invitation to give oneself over. The covenant itself calls on a person to know that from the moment he says yes, he will encounter situations that he has never dealt with before.
Sometimes he might feel like they are too much for him to manage. Sometimes he might feel that he is being pushed over the edge, and he’ll need to remember that there exists within him – within himself – beauty, love, wisdom and power that he has not yet encountered. All he needs to do is know that they are in him and ask for them to be revealed to him. This is the power of giving oneself over. These powers are revealed to those who ask.
But by the same token, I could enter into a marriage agreement because I believe that it’s worthwhile to me, that it will protect me, that it will allow me something that is not possible today. That it will calm my fears.
Here, too, I make vows and my wedding might be extremely moving, but my underlying interest, that which my mind says is best for me, will be the only determining factor. Love will be a fleeting emotion that is immediately influenced by any changes to my thoughts or reading of reality.
However, when I (or anyone else) operates from my soul, giving of myself without faltering and without imposing on myself restrictive standards, I can know whether or not I am truly giving myself over by the extent to which I agree to not succeed; whether or not I continue to do something even while fully knowing that things might not work out.
If I give myself over, even if the results are not as I wanted, the act itself will help me to connect to myself from the outside. It will help me to operate in new places, move in unfamiliar ways, and walk upon ground that is previously uncharted by me.
When I give myself over, every situation that I encounter and anything that happens to me allows me to grow. It allows me to recognize the difference between the world of the mind and the natural motion that is ushering in beauty and simplicity.
If I am not in a place of giving myself over but rather operating with the hope of preventing or achieving something, I will abandon things when the results are not as I wanted. I will be angry, I will despair and I will cause others to despair.
What is the connection between giving myself over and acting responsibly about what arises?
When I give myself over, the responsibility of “doing” moves from the interpreting mind – which wants to cause, prevent, and achieve – to the wisdom of the soul and a gentle tuning in to what’s going on and what’s motivating me now.
The responsibility of “doing” is my attention trying to recognize when it is that I am acting from my mind and its rules, and when I am acting according to my inner guidance.
When an action stems from a desire to prevent or achieve, it is accompanied by friction, effort and disagreement, and the action itself causes ever-deepening cycles of friction, fear and pain alongside great effort and cost.
Like attracts like. Lacking brings lacking. A belief that there will be pain brings pain.
Our responsibility lies in seeing the reality created by the thought and then observing that thought rather than being its effect or consequence.
Observation, noticing that it is a thought, allows us to tune in beyond the mind and the senses.
Does danger affect our ability to give ourselves over?
If, in times of danger, I do what I think is most effective or desirable, I am likely to miss out. I am likely to act according to the mind’s standards, which come from a perspective of fear, a belief that I need to control, and a desire to achieve or prevent things that I am certain will happen as I have predicted.
As such, I then incite a similar fear in others, causing them to feel a sense of danger and a desire to control, and I invite further behaviors aimed at force and survival.
If, in times of danger, I consider the thoughts that arise as I experience fear, I will not attempt to calm myself with comforting phrases or positive thinking, nor will I look for solutions. I will be able to see that even if something is taken from me, and even if force, coercion or oppression is exerted upon me, nothing can happen to the love that I am, to the beauty that is my nature or to the fact that everything in me is complete and that I will always be one with everything.
When this knowing arises in me, it is simple and precise, and the energy that I emit is one of wholeness and love. It creates a power in me, a silence that encompasses freedom and wisdom. And these are emitted to other person, impacting him. This is not to say that things immediately change or that everything is suddenly in my favor, but the chances for blessings and goodness are increased and the forceful behaviors often cease.
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Motion
Quantum physics beautifully describes the difference between the world that knows it is a wave and the world that thinks it is a particle.
The world, all of creation, is actually one enormous and infinite wave. It is continuity that is not always the same. Difference that is unification. Oneness. A singular fabric that is alive and breathing.
But we, as humans with a fundamentally mistaken view of the world and of ourselves, view the world in parts. As things. The kind with beginnings and ends. We look at the world and live it from a place of duality and separation. This is me and that is he. This is like this and that is like that. Good and evil. Right and wrong. Desirable and realistic. When we are in this illusion, we look at life from the outside. We disassemble the world in order to understand it. We do not feel or sense, within our bodies, the real motion – the infinite fluctuation that is the true nature of this world.
When we view a thought as a “thing” – disconnected from a larger motion, something that is out of context – it becomes like a cloud that conceals, like glasses which distort.
When we look at the thought from inside – entering it and allowing ourselves to ride it, to surf upon it as though on an ocean wave – we remember and we live our essence, that of one motion which never ends. The wave takes me and I, the taken, reveal myself, through the knowledge that I am one with the wave. There is no me, there is no wave, there is no ocean. There is motion. That’s it.
Then the thought, no matter what thought it is, becomes the wave reminding us of the pulsating oneness. That which everything is in and which is in everything.
And then, there is no more outside.
And then, there is no more inside.
And then, there is only what is.
Therefore, rather than focusing on the content of the thought, we can choose to notice it only to the extent necessary, so that we can ride it like an ocean wave. This way, we can be with it as it arises and as it recedes and fades back into the ocean. What is so fascinating and exciting is that we are the ocean from which the thought emerges and to which it returns. We are the infinite ocean.
This is the difference between teaching guitar and being a guitarist.
This is the difference between giving birth and being a woman.
This is the difference between making a revolution and being free.
When I allow the wave to take me, it fades back into its source. It never ceases to be but it does return to its natural state, united with everything. Omnipotent oneness, a living being that is creation itself.
Our nature is motion. We are motion. An occurrence. An infinite wellspring. Flowing. Nothing is more precise than our knowing that we are motion. We are not going somewhere nor are we coming from somewhere else. We are one infinite motion, all of us, the one. We are oneness that is so abundant, it is overflowing. This is why it is motion. This is our nature. This is what we are. It is not a means to something or someone.
We are motion because in each given moment, we end. The cells in our body die and new ones are born. Our thoughts dissipate and fade and new ones take their place. And we are born anew.
Every time we say that we are stuck, that we are wandering in the desert, that there is nothing – we are mistaken. Mistaken, meaning we are looking through a lens at an image to which we cling, believing what it tells us about how motion is supposed to look.
But what if, when I feel stuck, I ask myself: If there is no such thing as being stuck, if in every moment I am present, aware and wanting to know truth – then what is really happening here?
We have become confused. We have become accustomed to believing that we need to move and create movement in order to be motion. This is why we are focused on effort, on pushing and pulling, on stress.
This is why we are driven by fear. Because so many of us perceive a lack of movement to be death. A dead-end. A road leading nowhere.
Take, for example, the belief that if we do not do or act to make ourselves happy, we will be miserable. This is a thought that assumes that our natural state is misery and that only with effort and planning can we become happy. Only if we do something, and only if we do the right thing, will we be happy. Or at least not miserable.
We are motion.
How does knowing that we are motion impact our lives?
Being motion means that the steady things in our lives – those things that do not change, those things that repeat themselves – are what allow us to see the change and renewal within us. To see what is happening within us and who we are today. Like a buoy that shows how far we have swum or how much the water has moved us.
This is different from the belief that the steady things in our lives are those which maintain our stability in life and create security and continuity.
Being motion means that in every moment, I am new. I do not cross the same river twice – not just because the river itself flows and is thus constantly changing, but because I myself am no longer the same person. I am motion. This is different from the belief that in order to be renewed I need to do something, to change or become something new.
Being motion means that I am moving not because I have some sort of goal or because I must stop something from happening, but because it is my nature. I am energy. A presentation of energy.
This is different from the belief that movement is done in order to… so that…. Then, we believe that we are the masters and that the glass ceiling is as far as we can see or believe.
When I feel the need to initiate a motion and execute it, how does it then feel and look?
Sometimes the feeling of stagnancy (and not the stagnancy itself, since there is no stagnancy) can give me a hint that something is “out of place” and needs to move. This is an excellent indication and an opportunity for me to notice – what am I not allowing? What motion wants to happen within me that I am resisting? And why?
From there I act. I do something. But what I do comes from curiously tuning in to the motion that is already happening within me. It is more like I am obeying it than doing it.
Sometimes, I might “be mistaken”. That is to say, I might think that the motion has asked me to do something specific and I allow it. I do it. And then I discover that it has not led me to where I thought I would be. Maybe the action has even brought me to the very place I had hoped to move from.
When this happens, I understand that I was confused. Maybe I listened to a motion of fear, or of habit. Maybe I just heard what I wanted to hear. This is also good to know, because when we allow even “imprecise” motion, we become more precise and learn to distinguish between the motions.
Being motion means being a wave of energy. This is true even when we think that nothing is happening. For example, if the almond blossom does not flower in February, it doesn’t mean that there is no motion. There is definitely still motion – a natural motion that is completely harmonious and wonderfully precise. A musical piece that never ends is a cacophony of sounds. Taking a break is a necessary part of the natural and precise way that things occur. The almond blossom will flower exactly at the right time – at its own time. This is how it is. This is its motion.
This is contrary to the belief that we are merely a part, a particle, a tiny piece of a wave, something which sometimes appears and sometimes disappears.
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Mystery
Paul Evdokimov, a Russian theologian who was amongst the most influential in France, stated that: “A mystery that has been solved was never really a mystery.”
A mystery cannot be solved, conceptualized, explained or defined.
But its power is present in everything.
Its radiance illuminates all.
It is the place from which life emerges.
It is where joy in life is directed.
It is the driving force.
The film “21 Grams”, directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu, touches on this question with a piercing accuracy.
21 grams is the amount of weight that we lose the moment we die.
21 grams is the weight of the soul leaving the body.
Just think about how busy we are with everything around us.
How attached we are to the things that we can touch, smell, taste, hear and see, and how little physical presence is needed for the spirit. For what is real, for what life really is.
This is the source of all thoughts and it cannot be thought.
This is the source of all understandings and it cannot be understood.
This is the source of all prayers and it cannot be conceptualized in any prayer.
It can, perhaps, be conveyed through poetry.
It can, perhaps, be told through a story.
Hinted at.
It can, perhaps, be danced; danced for.
Allowed to shine through me.
We confuse mystery with hiding or concealment.
It is a question of responsibility.
Hiding is the fear of truth. It is a shroud, embarrassment, possessiveness. It is the thought that I control and direct my life and the lives of others.
Hiding is the fear of seeing what is true. It is the thought that if I don’t hide it, they won’t love me or want me.
And this thought becomes the basis of all my thoughts and actions. When I conceal, I lack trust and I lack faith. I fear myself. I fear others and I fear the world.
Thoughts of “lacking” and “having nothing” and “perhaps there never will be”.
A world of absence. Of something that is missing.
Concealment is measured. It is calculated. It comes at a cost. It creates pain and it increases fear.
Mystery is the natural, true state of all things. It is quiet and breathes spirit throughout the world.
Mystery comes with the discovery of beauty; with the simple motions of surrender and giving oneself over. It brings us to an encounter with the wisdom of the universe; with love.
We can see and feel this in infinite ways, without needing to do anything at all.
The mystery is always present. Nothing can dilute it or impact its abundance. It is eternal and mighty.
A woman whom I very much love described it as “living in the palm of God’s hand”.
Motion that arises from mystery.
When I relinquish – it is motion. It is me making space for true motion; motion that was not initiated by me.
When I am silent, I allow the driving force, that which removes and also brings, to be that which sets me in motion.
Motion.
When I observe passively and while resting, I allow an idea, a thought that creates, to flower and bear fruit.
An action. A dance. Wisdom and understanding of acceptance. The result – knowing. Actualization in the physical realm.
When I do not object, identify or lust, I allow the mystery to show myself to me.
When I observe these thoughts and consistently keep track of them, what remains is motion. Softer and sweeter than anything we have ever known.
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Thought Creates Reality
We were created with the power of thought.
Thought is a super-energy. A mega-energy. A mega-magnet.
Thus, the power of the thought that I believe attracts from the universe something that is identical to it.
The thought creates the existence of reality, which is actually its mirror.
Like attracts like.
What is external is internal. What is internal is external.
Always. Completely.
There is no way that I can think a thought without it finding some sort of external expression.
Everything that I see on the outside is happening within me during those moments.
A thought can find expression in the world in a variety of shapes and forms but the way it shows itself to the world changes according to the way the thought is programmed, the basic belief that it reflects.
A thought like “no one can be trusted – it’s best not to get close to anyone” creates an external situation in which there is loneliness and suspicion, and even the possibility of getting hurt if we get too close.
When this happens, it’s not because my behavior has caused another to act in a certain way, but rather because my energy has aroused and stimulated the energy of the other person, or the motions of nature and matter, and they are reacting to the energy that I am emitting. As such, when my actions stem from fear or need, I arouse in others their own fears and needs, which then become expressed in their behavior.
Fear arouses fear. Protective layers create protective layers. Thoughts create reality.
A thought like “they won’t understand – it’s best that I hide the truth” creates an external situation of concealment, non-communication, falseness and a tension to reveal more than can be seen. This is not a reaction but rather a mirror; it is not a consequence of actions but rather the reflection of a thought.
A thought like “people want to do good things and are happy when they see opportunities for doing so” creates an external situation in which there is an abundance of goodness directed at me from those wishing to work together towards the creation and dissemination of goodness. This abundance increases goodness being done all around me, including in situations in which I am vulnerable and might otherwise feel pain.
Often the interpreting mind takes this awareness, this understanding, and turns it into a scary scenario in which people believe that if they choose the wrong way, if they think dangerous thoughts, they will bring tragedy upon themselves. This is a confusion that happens when spiritual truth is translated into the language of the world of fear, which is busy preventing, solving and achieving.
This misunderstanding comes from the illusion that we are not always creating reality via our thoughts. There is no time like this. There is no possibility of this happening. Everything is one. Everything is with, through and inside of the one. As such, recognizing that thoughts create reality does not cause danger, but rather allows us to act out of awareness and responsibility towards the thoughts that we believe.
We can then awaken from the confusion and illusion that have accompanied us for so long.
Being One
What would become possible if, in the moment that something happens in our lives, instead of believing that it is reality, that it is a scenario that we know ahead of time, we stop for a moment and say: “What is really happening here? Do I really know that this is what I think it is?”
What could happen if, when seeing a person who thinks he is my enemy, I do not believe that I need to hate him or thwart his actions?
How would the life of a woman hurt by force and insensitivity look if instead of hurrying to say that from now on she can’t trust anyone, instead of remaining scarred and damaged forever, she asks: “What do I really think this did to my beauty? To the love that I am? To my ability to get close and bestow grace upon everybody?” How would her life look? How would my life look if I were to witness such a woman?
When I see nations in conflict and am convinced by their stories, what would become possible if I remembered that a person’s heart doesn’t tell him to do evil and that we are one, that we are happy, only when we do good? How would I act? What would I see in the other person? What would happen to him then?
What would happen if, when I see mass killings of human beings and I cry out “they are cruel!”, I am able to successfully distinguish between the horrible actions that were done and their hurting spirit, their loss of innocence?
The pain will sometimes be too much to bear. Our inner outcry over the brutal use of force will rise up and be overcome with fear. Our belief in good might become cracked. Despair might spread throughout our bodies.
But within all of this, specifically within the fire, without any attempt to investigate, from a place of looking at things as they are, a quiet will arise in me and there will be space to breathe. A moment before the quiet prevails I will be in the heart of the storm. Shaken to the core, immense fear, sharp pain and complete helplessness.
And there, within this place of increasing helplessness, the noise, pain and fear begin to fade and an understanding spreads throughout my body that there is nothing I can do to change things.
When this happens, there are no more thoughts or possibilities. All of the cries of “I must” and “it couldn’t be” are silenced. This is the end of hope, possibility and form. The understanding surrenders. Complete silence.
The only thing that can be heard is that which really exists, that which never ends. And then, in the middle of all this, in the heart of everything that is happening, a path shows itself. A moment of grace. We become guided by inner knowing. Its source is not cleverness or calculation. There is no attempt to prevent or resist what is happening. It emerges from a place of “’what is”, from what is happening, but it does not deduce what the mind is used to deducing. It sees something new.
When I do not revert to definitions or names, I gain direct access to the act itself, to expressions, words, voices and bodies. I see, I sense, I smell and I hear. I experience the here and now. I am alive. I am truly alive.
In this moment in which I turn to myself, in which I stop searching externally for the absolute and the objective, a trans-dimensional leap occurs. If the mind that simplifies and separates no longer has what to cling to, it can become peaceful and silent – just as a fire slowly dwindles when there are no longer flammable materials in its midst.
In these moments we experience who we really are. Something that is not our thoughts.
The true and natural me, the one, the source of life itself. Energy, pure awareness, me. Clear, totally free, present in everything forever. I cannot be defined. Nobody can hold me down or abandon me. Free from sorrow. Made from my eternal nature, always divine. In these moments, we return and recall that we are whole. That there is no other way. That there never has been. The separations and divisions into particles end with one.
So what, we don’t do anything? We just observe?
The questions “what do we do?” or “what can be done?” are what drive the world of fear. What we are encountering is not what is actually happening. It is only the reality that our mind allows us to see and experience. Our thoughts and beliefs, laws of the world of fear, are what create and mediate the experience itself.
Actions done out of identification with these thoughts, those that occur automatically when certain things happen, create endless cycles of thought, feeling, action, result, thought, feeling…. It is a closed circuit. History repeating itself. This kind of action makes no difference. It does not create a new reality. It is not me emerging from outside of myself.
When we stop, say yes to active experiencing and then do it directly and profoundly, we can use our feelings to identify the thought that is behind the action at that very moment.
We can identify the thought and understand that it is not us nor does it in itself bring about quiet, but that it does allow us to move from a state of thinking to a state of presence; a state of being and of living within it.
When I do not resist this, I can feel the deep influence of the thought. I am alert to it and I pay attention. When I am fully present in the energy in my body, I am able to see and differentiate between the thought and energy immersed in it, and the realm of being. And then, in a mindful manner, I become a state of consciousness that is aware of itself.
A stronger light and broader field of vision, not limited by thoughts, arise on their own. The actions that emerge from this strong light and broad field of vision are expressions of a new place, a transformation that has already occurred.
The action is not done in order to create a situation that is not us, but rather to express what was always there.
What about “making a difference?”
The real difference will not be made by means of resistance and change, because both resistance and change are reactions to thoughts, to situations. Every reaction perpetuates and reinforces the situation – because by their very nature, reactions place the situation that I want to change at the center of my attention, and whatever is placed at the center of my attention becomes bigger and stronger.
Therefore, I can make a true difference by simply observing in a manner that is void of interpretation – and by staying in touch with the thought that was identified. This is the true meaning of “making a difference” – I can create a new reality by virtue of noticing and recognizing rather than struggling and resisting.
This is the power of being awake, of our nature as conscious beings. Conscious individuals who know that we are not our thoughts but rather something more beautiful than we could ever imagine. Who recognize that it is our responsibility to live this infiniteness for which we were created.
And what do we do about things that are really difficult – for example, rape?
This is an extreme situation. A helplessness that is, at times, absolute.
Shock. Dependence. Brutality and violence.
It is a look that tells you that you do not exist other than for him – other than as a medium, a means.
I observe, gently and slowly.
I search.
I peel away the outer layers of myself.
What would I say happens during an act of rape?
What truly happens to me when I am forced to engage in sexual activity that I do not want?
I can’t skip past the pain or the fear. I cannot feel that I am one with a person who is controlling my body with such force. I can only see the separateness. I need to agree to recognize this separateness. I need to experience it, and only then will I be able to reach oneness.
I can’t ignore the injustice, the cruelty. I can’t polish over them or refer to them in pleasant terms. I need to see them fully, to allow them full emotional space inside of me.
I need to allow them to shake me to my core. I need to agree to see the situation as it is and to feel what it is doing to me now, fully and completely.
Even if my mind chooses to call it “absolute evil” and respond to it accordingly, both physically and emotionally – I want to be in it. I don’t want to tell myself that it’s just my thoughts, because this is where I currently am.
Now, without demanding anything of myself, without asking myself to feel differently, without asking myself to not feel pain or hate, when I allow it all to be, something arises in me and it’s not completely clear from where it has come.
I know that it is not me who has caused it; I don’t even know how to do it. But it is here. And it is a silence that is alive. Its motion spreads throughout me. It is like I have returned home.
Rape is something that happens within a specific period of time.
By fully seeing and facing the immense and overpowering pain and fear, when the act itself is over, when that specific moment in time has ended – its power is gone.
That is, unless we remain stuck in the thought that says “something horrible happened”, “this is traumatic”, “it will always be like this”, “I will never again be who I was.”
When there are thoughts like these, even though the event itself has indeed ended, we continue to experience it residually through our active mind.
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Identity, Affiliation, Clinging
Attachment to one’s identity or persona, and clinging to continuity, is like a wave that takes itself seriously.
A wave that does not want to return to the ocean’s water.
That wishes to continue to exist.
That sees itself as separate from the ocean.
As an independent being.
The pain is double.
One aspect of the pain is that the wave wishes for something that is impossible.
It rises for a singular moment in time before it returns and is dissolved into the ocean.
It desires something that will not happen.
Something that is against its nature.
It fights against it, using all of its energy to prevent that which will inevitably come to pass. It won’t enjoy this moment of transcendence, in which it is able to know and to remember – in which it can see and observe beauty, power and the oneness of the ocean, of what we are.
The second aspect of pain is that the wave separates itself from its source – the one, whole and complete source that is us and that is everything. The desire to be unique and to control events, and the fear that warns of loss and mistakes, makes it seem like we can be separated from the one and instills in us an illusion of separation and control.
By doing so, we deprive ourselves of the experience of the ocean.
The knowing that this is us.
The understanding that nothing can be lost.
That nothing can disappear.
That no one can truly be lacking.
That everyone is an ocean.
When I see and know in every moment of my life that it is not possible to be anything but an ocean, I live my life in a dance of responsiveness – because I know, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that I am not dependent on anything and that anything I discover reminds me that I am an actor of the soul.
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Saying Yes
The world is found in “what is”. It exists in the alive.
The mind exists in a place of “no”. The no of now, of emptiness, of lacking.
In the no that will most likely occur if I don’t get there or if I lose and am left without.
No gap exists unless the mind creates something imaginary, a picture, a sculpture, a mask. Only then may a gap occur, in this world that we create through our thoughts.
And it then becomes a script. A well-told story. And it is therefore also fragile and, like all stories, subject to refutation and change. Just like in dreams.
Saying yes is the motion that “what is” knows and can recognize, and within which it can thrive. It is a daily practice that allows us to come into contact with what exists, with the motion that asks us to participate. To respond. To live.
Saying yes does not mean that I must accept everything that is done to me and also does not necessarily mean that I will do whatever I am asked to do.
Responsiveness and responsible participation comes from not arguing with what is already here. It guides me to truth, to being present in what is happening right now, to seeing and feeling, breathing it in and letting it enter me without any defenses, without feeling a need to protect myself – simply allowing it within me.
And I observe. I do not try to go outside of myself for this observation. I want to see myself, in the moment, from inside, without any attempt to organize or sort, without a desire to find a solution or use it. I just breathe in what is happening. And the energy spreads throughout my being – opening, cracking, mixing, asking, doubting, even hurting.
And I breathe and ask for more. I inhale energy and notice what it does. And as it does what it does – I feel, I undergo, I experience and I agree to it.
When this happens, I am able to see that there are understandings and images falling apart and fading away. Sometimes they are slowly peeled away, and sometimes they were never true, never came from outside of myself, from the true nature of things. I observe what comes to pass and I find myself rooted in what is true, guided by it and nourished from it, seeing more and saying yes, more simply and more absolutely.
When the outer peel of the thought is shed, when I do not cling or argue, when what I see radiates and reminds me, when I have clarity – my encounter with reality is a true encounter. Soul meets soul. We stand facing each other and learn to know ourselves and the other. We can truly see what exists in the here and now.
